Dear 2005,

Wow. You've been one heck of a year. Can I say that again? You've really been one heck of a year. Here's an overview:

• About two weeks into you, you decided to teach me what loss was. Yeah, I know that most people have experienced that when they are my age, but I hadn't. At least not to the extent to which you taught it. It hurt. I know it wasn't really your fault, but I still resent it.
  
• You taught me that my Heavenly Father is very mindful of me. He gives me wonderful things like a perfect, extremely unwarranted and out-of-my-dreams internship (paid!) during a time when I needed a reason to wake up every day. That meant that my year included being blessed financially immediately after I graduated. I was able to be independent. You gave me a life I had not dared to imagine--a life after college.
• You gave me a job that I view as absolutely perfect--the perfect people to work with, the perfect mix of responsibilities, and the field that I have always wanted to work in.
• You gave me my first car :) A beautiful, little, silver Mazda3. It makes me happy on long commutes.
• You taught me how to get over loss. It has taken longer than I imagined, but I think I have done it as much as it can be done.
• You have taught me how much my friends mean to me. I think because of that I have tried to value their influence in my life and be a larger part of theirs, but it has also made me a little wary of the future. I am not sure what I will do when I have to leave them, or when they leave me.
• You taught me to understand better who I am. I am not just a happy, spunky girl who likes to claim she is twelve years old when she not. I will not always be happy. I will not always be spunky. And some days I will feel much, much older than twelve. But there is a deeper core of me that will always be there. I will always be me.
• You taught me about tender mercies. I have learned that they are plentiful, and they are always there.

I am not the same girl that I was when we met, dear 2005. In some ways that makes me a little sad and nostalgic, but it also fills me with a sense of completeness and growth. And, deep down, despite all the highs and lows, I want to thank you for that.

Love always,
Your Brit